I don’t remember landing in Tokyo. I don’t remember the flight. But the moment my feet hit the pavement marked the first leg of what would be a three month journey. What I do remember is that I had just said good-bye, and that I was heartsick, drunk on lights, and hungry.
The night before I left Tennessee, he & I stayed together, and he drove me to the airport the next morning. I usually took the shuttle; it was something new & wonderfully horrible to have anyone to say good-bye to. That morning I awoke pre-dawn, easing myself out of the bed so as to not wake him but staring at him for what seemed like a long while. I finished packing methodically in the dark—my life for three months summed up in a backpack. I ran a last minute errand to the 24 hr. drug store as daylight broke. I felt in control, like I could do it, like I could leave for three months without falling apart. I woke him and showered. He grabbed us coffee & pastries from his shop, and we left.
On the two hour drive to the Atlanta international terminal, we smiled as much as we could, listened to the radio—pop music exclusively at my request—and talked, my hand on the back of his head the whole way. Our tenor was frantically positive. I couldn’t look down. I was going to Japan! A lifelong dream. But I was leaving him, the man I’d only just found, for what felt like an eternity. My emotions weren’t on the up and up as to what to do with all that information. At that point, I didn’t even know what we were, but I knew we were in love. Still, three months is a long time, and I didn’t feel I had any right to claim him. We’d only known each other for a few whirlwind weeks. I remember telling him if he saw other people while I was gone that was fine but to please not tell me. I was trying to be whatever it is I thought a grown up was. Reasonable. Measured. Detached even. It was a laugh. I was out of my mind in love. And leaving, leaving, leaving. So far away for such a long time. The only way to look was forward.
As we drew closer to the airport, he cried at a red light while singing along with an inane song which in turn made me laugh-cry. None of it was very dignified, and all of it was very sweet. That song would, in my mind, become our song, and I would listen to it hundreds of times as I wandered the world over the next three months. Within 15 hours of watching him drive away, I was standing in the heart of Tokyo for the first time in my life, hundreds of people pulsing through the fluorescent night streets. There is nothing quite like the feeling of being sleep deprived, in love, and alone in Tokyo. It seemed as it should be.
Hungry. That’s right. I was hungry. I wandered Shibuya with it’s arcades and drunks and drug stores. I found myself a tourist in what I can only assume was the Japanese equivalent of a Walgreens. It was all fascinating to me. There seemed to be a lot of products dedicated to the beautification of feet. It was excellent. I possessed the dumb wonder of a child those first few jet lagged hours. I sent him photos of everything thing I saw and ate. I was alone, but I wasn’t. The entire three months I was gone ended up being that way. From the other side of the world, he was my constant companion, always by my side.
For my first meal, I ducked into an unassuming noodle bar, a Japanese diner of sorts. It was dark and there was one narrow bar facing the kitchen where great pots steamed beneath shelves lined with ceramic bowls and one man with a kerchief on his hand tended the pots with military precision. The counter was lined with utilitarian pitchers of ice water, and one lone middle-aged Japanese man sat at the far end of the bar, head down over a bowl of noodles. It had to have been no earlier than 1 AM.
It took me a moment to figure out the system, how to order. I finally discerned, through not-so-surreptitious watching of another fellow noodle goer that trickled in, that I needed to insert my yen into what looked like a vending machine plastered with shoddy photos of each dish. I studied them carefully. My obvious lack of literacy in Japanese meant I was ordering by sight alone. I went for one with a broth that dark shade of red that promises heat topped with a creamy poached egg, fatty pork, and bright scallions. During my time in Japan, I ended up going back to that ramen bar three times, always for that bowl.
That first evening I got yelled at for trying to snap a photo, quickly learned to mind my manners, and then found myself shame-facedly googling “how to properly eat ramen” on my iphone beneath the counter. I realized that despite my illustrious career as a collegiate ramen consumer, I didn’t really know the drill. After a quick scan of ramen-eating-how-to’s (which are things that exist), I too slurped dutifully, my head down, chopsticks in one hand, spoon in the other. Once full & finally back in my concrete room overlooking the city, I collapsed, exhausted. My first night in Japan.
The next two days would be spent exploring the Tsukiji fish market (where I consumed copious amounts of sashimi, stubbornly obtained myself a delectable bowl of what I can only call “delicious brown fish parts on rice” from an old woman despite the language barrier, and ate absolutely every curiosity I passed by from sweet omelet slices to sticky grilled eel); seeking out little coffee houses, minimalist shops, and slow food eateries friends recommended; wandering Asakusa & Shimokitazawa; and generally letting both the city & I mutually swallow one another whole. After two short days I hopped a train, that inane pop song on repeat in my ear, and headed to the Kiso Valley…
Find my Tokyo recommendations below. They are hardly comprehensive, but they are some of the best places I found & loved in Tokyo. Add your own recommendations in the comments so we can all share what we love in this vibrant, diverse city…as this was certainly the first of many explorations to come!
1. life son
2. eattrip
3. the little shop of flowers
4. fog linen
5. bear pond espresso
6. omotesando koffee
7. tarui bakery
8. tsukiji fish market
9. wander shimokitazawa
10. beard
11. asakusa – street food & temple in the old town
12. Arts & Science
13. Aji Gen Ramen, Shibuya
Goodness, how touching your love story is, Beth, and how beautifully-evocative your writing; I felt like I was right there beside you, on that very first night, tired, and thoughtful, and trying to find my feet. It is always a pleasure to read your words, and even more so when they are coupled with your remarkable photography. Glorious. All so glorious.
I am seeing so much Japan lately, I love it! My dad lived there for 4 years and I am happy to see the beauty he described in photos like yours.
This was heartwrenching and heartlifting to read. I swear to you, as you described that drive to the airport I was going in my mind “she’s gonna start singing along to some song and then burst into tears while he drives.” Alas, seems it was the other way around, and that, my dear, brought a couple of tears to my eyes…
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You describe your adventures with such beauty and emotion! It’s a treasure to read and imagine an experience so richly illustrated. Thanks so much for sharing your travels and those GORGEOUS photos!
I recently visited Tokyo for the first time myself. Seeing other people’s posts about their visits makes me so nostalgic. Tokyo is truly a magical city that I never wanted to leave!
I love your list of places to visit too- I explored the city and also found and fell in love with Omotesando Koffee. So minimalistic and beautiful!
Glad you had a good time 🙂
Jaclyn
natsukashii…This post brings back a flood of memories for me. Each year back in the US, the memories of my life in Japan, but photos and descriptions like these renew them all over again. Thank you! I am so happy that you were able to do your dream.
natsukashii…This post brings back a flood of memories for me. Each year back in the US, the memories of my life in Japan fade, but photos and descriptions like these renew them all over again. Thank you! I am so happy that you were able to do your dream.
I just found your blog and am love love loving it! That for inspiring my Wednesday! I too share a dream of going to Japan and am looking forward to readying more. Stunning photos!!! Oh I am happy!
I love this – I’m heading to Tokyo, Kyoto and Kanazawa on Monday for a little while and I have been looking for things to try and see and do. Thanks for putting this list together!
This story is lovely and your pictures are really beautiful, too!
Very touching love story Beth. My children have a fascination with Japan and one has spent years at a time there. My youngest is planning her trip, (albeit with boyfriend in tow) next spring. Love your last Love Story post too, and am looking forward to the next Japan instalment. (Sent the link to Chloe, who writes a fledgling blog at chloebelanger.com)
Beth,
lovely post and I’m going to give you some advice. Not because I consider myself wiser or more lived than you but because it once served me well. If you are in a relationship that is still at that new stage, where you feel new baby vulnerable and every sentence they speak becomes loaded with cryptic double speak and meaning, say what you mean.
Don’t say “it’s okay to see other people but don’t tell me” if it really isn’t okay. If the thought breaks your heart, don’t say it as some form of test or an attempt to pre-emptively wrap yourself in a thick triple ply comfort blanket. Keep it plain, keep communication easy to understand, keep it honest and infuse your words with what you really think and feel. Don’t test them. Don’t try to gauge love by throwing comments like this at them in the hope that they’ll respond with the answer you want them to give. It might backfire.
I hope it all works out for you my lovely.
Haha. Yes…that’s what the early stages are like. A dance. And when I said it, I meant it. I didn’t know what was right to expect. But that quickly didn’t matter. Neither of us saw other people. We were madly in love…and now we’re married! So yes…it worked out in the end! : )
Such a gorgeous post… Asia has this unique aesthetic feel, and looking at this made me miss my visit to Taiwan.
Thank you for putting together that list. Tokyo’s my favorite city too but I’ve never been to those places. My husband and I are going to Tokyo again in September and we’ll definitely check out Fog Linen and Omotesando Koffee. By the way, I love reading your love story. It feels like reading a novel. It was so sweet and touching when he cried at a red light when driving you to the airport!
What a wonderful post.
It must of been difficult to leave your partner and jet off to Japan it looks like you had an amazing experience thought x
This post is so beautiful! Thank you for sharing your trip Beth, seeing Japan through your eyes makes me wish we were back in Tokyo.
What a beautiful journey and an honest recounting of your feelings. Traveling does something magical to you and it’s brave to walk around with such an open heart. It’s also great that you didn’t let your conflicted feelings about leaving spoil your dream and that in fact it heightened a new dream. Beautiful photos and beautiful thoughts. Much happiness to you both.
🙂 Beautiful. Happy Friday Beth.
Beautiful, Beth. So beautiful. <3
wow – those pictures are stunning! makes me wanna go to tokyo!
bisou, Mirjam
http://www.jeneregretterien.ch
In love with the mood of your photos! <3
Best, Albert | Palming Pebbles
your New Orleans guide made my trip incredible, I look forward to visiting some of these spots on a someday-trip to Japan . You’re voice is honest & raw and I love it. Thanks for sharing yourself.
Could you tell me this gorgeous space where you stayed?
What a magnificent journey! Alone in a foreign city, and wandering to your hearts content. I love it! I hope to someday explore more outside my comfort zone, to places my wandering heart yearns to see.
Hi Beth! Thanks as always for providing such enchanting photos, such entrancing prose, and such stylish and beguiling insight to one of the most impressive countries on earth!
Your writing makes me feel something I can’t describe… A kind of yearning. But it’s nourishing, too. It’s your poet’s soul, laced with courageous vulnerability. Thank you for this blog, it feeds me.
What a beautiful journey Beth. So glad to hear that you are happy and in love.
Hopefully next time, you will be there with “him”.
So many similarities with my trip two years ago. I can relate to the feeling of being sleep deprived, in love and alone in Tokyo. Shimokitazawa was one of the highlights of my stay there. Need to go back, and I kind if did thanks to your great post. Thank you.
What a beautifully written story of newfound love and exquisite sweetness/agony of being a solo traveler! I felt like I was there with you for every twinge of the heart and slurp of ramen. So happy to have found your blog!
I was going to write you that today I ´Ve done nothing of all the tasks I had written down to start with. I was going to tell you how anguish I feel, anxious. I was so long so disoriented that I had to stop and looked for one of your posts, ” to calm me down” I thought. I red one or two. I discover that I need slowness, to get to love my work and that it means to do it slow, in sequences ( can never do a good drawing in one time). . I tought that maybe I don´t have to design 20 prints for the textile show, but maybe just five…. and then when I was about to shut down the computer to attend my kids, I tought that I have done some very important tasks today: to reorganize my priorities, to reorganize my lists. thank you. Lola,
WHoa thos pictures are amazing! I wish I could visit there too…
http://www.theeyetraveler.com
Wonderful photos and writing! I had a similar experience, except in reverse. I landed in Tokyo on my own in 2009 nursing a broken heart, after finally ending my first grown-up, 4 year relationship. I stayed in Asakusa and my first day was spent wandering the neighbourhood, trying to order in what turned out to be an unagi restaurant and feeling embarrassed by my lack of etiquette. It was the best time of my life and Japan more than filled the hole in my heart. I’m looking forward to reading Part 2 next 🙂
I have been following your work for a while now and was so excited to see these posts on Japan. I lived in Tokyo for 3 years and in the mountains of Nagano for a year and this was so nostalgic for me. Fabulous writing and imagery. Much love!
I heard somewhere else that Japan is often ranked high in the list of most-wanted-to-come city in the world. Your post has totally captured all Japan in its most beauty and unique. Together with that, I love the way you narrate your story which is absolutely moved and attractive to the last words. You are good both at photographing and writing story. Oh, God. I’m wondering if I should go there anymore…as everything is here already.
This was all perfect. And it made me miss Japan even more…!
Just curious about where you stayed in Tokyo? I love your blog and follow you on instagram and I am now planning my honeymoon in Japan. You have an amazing photo of a bed in a cosy looking room in this post and I am curious of where it was! x
Hi! i am keen to know the same thing. where did you stay? the room looks adorable. Yael did you ever find out? xx
sometimes i feel like i can’t comment on your posts because to do so would be to break some magic whisper in the silence. run a small crack through some beautiful, new, finely textured porcelain bowl. and that bowl holds all of your stories, each one a slippery noodle that i sink into the further i read and view. i want simply to walk away, breathless and thankful and quiet. holding the new bird of your story very softly in my hands and then letting it fly without anything but wide eyes and a new memory. thank you.
Hi Beth,
I don’t know if you already know or someone in here mentioned, but in your 1st and 9th picture (the lamp with the notes), the upper central note is in ancient Greek (“Ερως ανίκατε μάχαν) and is a famous quote from Sophocle’s tragedy Antigone, which means “love, invincible in battle”. An ode to love if you will. Just thought I should mention it. Be well. Much love from Greece.
Nice post ! thank you for your share!
Its a great recipe. I will give a try today.thanks for sharing!!!
I don’t know what the likelihood of you seeing this is, but would you mind giving me the name/link to where you stayed? The concrete room pictured looks perfect for my solo venture to Tokyo later this year. Best wishes x
Hi,
Thank you for the beautiful pictures… I too would be interested to know where you stayed, the cozy bed in the concrete room??
Hi Beth,
I was wondering if you could post where you stayed whilst you were in Tokyo, as the photo looks amazing of your concrete walled room and a cozy bed with an amazing view?
Hi Beth,
I have been following on on your life journey for years and now after a long time, I too am making the journey to Tokyo and I would love LOVE to know where you stayed as that vibe of the little room in your pictures is what I am after. Many thanks!
Japan is an amazing place, one I’ve also enjoyed bringing kids to. Love that you mention the slurping – it’s such an unabashedly cultural quirk that signals enjoyment. yet in the west would be met with shock and considered rude.